Dolphin #1 or JB and the Dolphin
For the past month I have hardly been doing anything but sitting in my room being depressed, listening to way to sad music and wasting away. The biggest mistake I tend to do is having all these expectations about things and then have them shattered, which generaly leads me to sitting in my room being depressed, listening to way to sad music and wasting away. After spending a week in my room without even leaving to get food (I ate the weirdest combinations of whatever I could find in the kitchen), I finally got my ass up and decided to go back to the most depressing place in all of Turkey: University. I don't want to tell you how bad the University is, because actually it's not bad, it's just different, educating their students for a different future than mine will ever be. They have to draw very neatly in ways that I could never draw and frankly, I'm not interested in drawing like that. The education is fitting for people who want to go on working for a company like, I dunno, something better than H&M, but very similar to that. I want to become an independent designer who is going to be very dependent on their mum. (She knows how the world works, I don't.) I intend to make fashion that people like me want to wear, confused people in their twenties who think they're still a teenager, that is.
So, naturally, all the teachers hate what I do. But that's probably good. I have to deal with a lot of rejection and criticism. One thing I know for sure is that I'm not going to change who I am to please anybody but myself and I really really like myself, like, a lot, so, I'm not going to change.
I know that I'm still far from being as good as I can be and that I have a trillion more things to learn before I can become said independent designer, but I also know that I'm not going to learn these things here. But I'm learning other things, like, how to live on my own, how to live in a foreign country without really knowing the language, I'm even learning bank stuff! Most importantly I'm learning alot about myslef and how to stop myself from falling.
This kitschy post was brought to you by Dalia von Wegen, Mermaidprincess, Queen of nothing and everything, Godess of pancakes.
PS: The first picture is my Fiber Arts project, the next 4 are some of the illusrations for my Fashion Illustration calss (they are highly unappreciated by my teachers), and the last two pictures are some of the work for my (also highly unappreciated) collection. (Note the sarcasm.)
